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Your kids just asked you if you smoke weed
Colorado voters passed historic 2014 legislation legalizing the sale and purchase of marijuana. In 2020, more than 40 states passed laws legalizing marijuana in some way, with a number of those states also legalizing possession and recreational use. Canada legalized marijuana in 2018, and similar initiatives are currently taking place in the UK, New Zealand, Australia and other countries.
These developments have caused many parents to wonder what this means for their children’s future. Parents are increasingly asking how to approach this issue with their children and how to structure their responses to ensure their children’s health and safety. For example, should parents use cannabis in front of their children? How about a beer or a glass of wine?
Undoubtedly, it is unusual in modern society for an illegal product to become legal and purchasable. Since no generation since the days of Prohibition can recall such a transition from illegal to legal, it is reasonable that there are concerns and apprehensions about the legalization of cannabis. Nonetheless, this topic, like most issues parents have to deal with, can be a wonderful stepping stone for parents to clarify the truth about substance abuse and use in our culture, regardless of how we think about it.
First, parents and children need to understand what legalizing cannabis means for everyone. The rules and laws vary significantly from state to state. Still, it’s important to realize that cannabis use is considered an adult substance. In states like Colorado, it’s illegal for anyone under the age of 21 to possess or use cannabis, and it’s also illegal to drive while under the influence of cannabis.
Federal law in the United States remains unchanged, meaning cannabis remains illegal. The minimum age to use cannabis in Canada also varies by province. However, it should be 18 in many places. While this information may seem insignificant, it’s important to keep it in mind when discussing marijuana use with your child.
Discuss with your children
When talking to your child about a complex subject, the best place to start is to provide them with the best information and facts you can glean. Doing an internet search with your child to learn more about cannabis and its effects on the human body is an excellent place to start. For example, you can learn how marijuana compounds affect the body, the plant’s effects on a teenager’s developing brain, sleep, judgment and general well-being.
Just like with alcohol, you can educate your child about the dangers of marijuana as a mind-altering substance, especially for teens who are still physically and emotionally developing. You can give your child the “task” to look up several articles that discuss the effects of marijuana use on the brain from a medical perspective. Use these articles as a starting point for a conversation about cannabis.
It can be easy to talk to your child about legalizing cannabis if you don’t agree. It may be more difficult to convince your child to understand the negative effects of marijuana use if you are campaigning for its legalization or if you are currently using it yourself. Keep in mind that even if marijuana is legal in your state, and regardless of how you personally feel about its legalization and use, it is still illegal for anyone under the age of 21. You should use this knowledge to decide what to teach your child.
The next time you talk to your child about marijuana, think about their age. Information can best be provided to younger children (primary school age) on a need-to-know basis. It can be helpful for older children (middle school or high school age) to help separate reality from fiction about what cannabis is and its effects. Even if your child might object and claim they already know all about it, don’t be so quick to let them off the leash.
Children of this age may believe they already have all the details based on information shared by peer groups. However, as with alcohol and sex, much of their data is mostly wrong. So it would be helpful if you started the dialogue. Let your child speak freely until they have told you everything they know. If some information is inaccurate, ask them follow-up questions and provide the correct information.
Difficult Questions Your Child May Ask.
Your child may ask challenging questions about cannabis use, and you should be prepared to answer as intelligently and honestly as possible. Below are some likely comments/questions you might come across and some answers you might find useful.
Legalizing cannabis means it is safe to use
Make it clear to your child that this is not always the case. There are several legal substances such as tobacco, alcohol and opioids that can be dangerous or even fatal if used or abused. This also applies to cannabis.
Although alcohol kills many people, marijuana appears to be a safer alternative.
Point out that just because the headlines don’t report deaths directly linked to marijuana use doesn’t mean it’s a safer substance. Repeat that cannabis use impairs decision-making ability and lowers inhibitions, which can lead to poor decisions that are potentially fatal.
Have you ever tried cannabis?
First, make sure your answer is short and concise without going into too much detail. Try not to dwell on the past. But instead, think about what you have learned and understood now as an adult and why you are concerned about your child and their future.
What should I do when I am tempted?
You can tell your child, “We expect you to stay away from any substance because we understand the potential health risks. In addition to explaining that you would be there for them, build your child’s confidence by practicing some responses for the case.
Conclusion
As with many others on the subject of danger, a one-time conversation with your child on the subject will not be enough. This is a discussion to start with your child, beginning in the pre-adolescent years and continuing through high school or college. Allowing your child to know that you are there for them every moment of the way and continuing the dialogue at every stage of their growth will go a long way in helping your child stay substance free.
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