Feds are relaxing rules on cannabis use to attract younger workers

Nobody understands how regressive (and… evil) the FBI is. Thanks for burning down all those fields of pretty plants over the years guys, not to mention the countless lives ruined by the War on Drugs. It doesn’t make up for it, but the federal government is finally relaxing its rules on drug screening, reports the New York Times. Why? As the older generations, who were often more sympathetic to Nancy Reagan’s thinking, leave the workforce, federal agencies must recruit younger workers. And younger workers have grown up in a different era, understanding that cannabis is both a medicine and a generally safe way to relax and enhance life (without the aggression that boomers’ three-martini lunches carry with them bring).

Like it or not, federal agencies know that polls show that more than half of Americans enjoy cannabis and that a majority believe it should be legal. Medical cannabis use is legal in 38 states (and DC, home of federal agencies) and recreational cannabis is legal in 22 states. Yet it remains illegal under federal law in an increasingly absurd loop.

And let’s be clear. The federal government doesn’t say its employees can start using cannabis. So what’s changing?

Historically, even honesty that you used cannabis would disqualify you for many federal jobs. Therefore, the authorities are reducing the guidelines related to past cannabis use. The New York Times reports that over the past five years, 3,400 new military recruits who failed a drug test on their first day were given a “grace period to try again.” Biden is also expected to stop digging deep into cannabis use of the past when he requests safety clearances.

And the CIA traditionally told applicants to abstain from cannabis for a year before applying. But in April last year, they shortened that to 90 days. And in 2021, the FBI reduced its abstinence requirement from three to one year. And, kindly (yes, that’s sarcasm), the Office of Personnel Management decided to no longer consider considering people who had previously used cannabis as a security risk in order to streamline the security screening process.

Currently, if you want to apply for a security clearance, you must confess to any illegal drug use in the last seven (!) years (detailed, similar to when you join Scientology and you have to disclose any dirt). Under their new and improved laws, that number would drop to five. Regarding cannabis, applicants are only required to disclose any use 90 days before the job search, which at least acknowledges that cannabis poses fewer risks than other drugs (although cocaine is Schedule II and cannabis Schedule I, so if we’re to believe the Feds , punch is safer than puff-puff-pass).

As for military service, the Army waived more than 3,300 recruits who failed a drug test or admitted past drug use between 2018 and 2022. The Army is the most relaxed — the Navy historically has a zero-tolerance policy for anyone who fails their entry drug test, but they’ve recently begun allowing recruits to take another piss test after 90 days if you fail the first one. Both the Air Force and Marine Corps also offer second chances.

In the post-COVID job market, federal agencies must now compete with the private sector, where many people can work from home and even keep their sativa vape nearby when they need an energy boost. It seems that the pandemic and the resulting economic fallout have forced them to get their heads out of their butts and relax some guidelines. Let’s hope that one day they will realize that even their new “loose” policies are as far off as satanic panic.