Why does my grass smell like feces?

Lorena Cupcake, voted “Chicago’s Best Budtender” in 2019, has answered hundreds of questions from cannabis buyers and patients during her time as a budget tenderer. And now they’re turning that experience into a monthly advisory column, Ask a Budtender. Have a question for cupcake? Send your questions to askabudtender@weedmaps.com.

Dear cupcake,

The other day I made the mistake of buying a bag of weed without smelling it. After I opened it it looked normal, but it smelled like a bloated bathroom. Is it normal for flowers to smell like feces?

– Dooky, thanks Dennis

PS: It tasted good, but I’ll never buy it again.

Dear Dooky Thank you Dennis,

I was in your position, Triple D. I don’t remember what strain it was, but I remember that ripe scent and earthy taste like it was yesterday. I rarely say no to weed, but I plan to stay away from all backhouse-flavored buds in the future.

Not all cannabis smells pleasant to all people, and the experience can be very subjective. During my time as a budtender, newbies to cannabis often preferred varieties that smelled of berries and dessert. In contrast, heavier hash heads often develop a taste for the more pungent scents that resin can provide, such as gasoline, garlic, and parmesan.

Is a “poop” flavor a natural variation on the bouquet cannabis can offer, or is it an indication that something has gone seriously wrong with your stash? The answer is not that straightforward; hold your nose while we dive in.

Off-Flavors: Learning from the world of wine

I’m far from the first writer to draw parallels between wine and weed, but today we’re not talking about terroir or terpenes. We’re talking about mistakes: something that prevents you from enjoying the substance of your choice the way it should be enjoyed.

On The Wine 101 Podcast, VinePair Tasting Director Keith Beavers has a great look at the taste of cork, one of the most iconic wine mistakes. Even among industry professionals, he says it is always strange to find a corked bottle (or a bottle contaminated with a molecule known as TCA): “Nobody wants to be the first to say they are corked if they are is not corked … When I do Wine Courses IRL, I actually enjoy when a wine is corked so I can put the uncorked wine next to it so everyone can get a feel for what corked wine is and just get it over with . “

With cannabis, these distinctions can be just as difficult to make, notes David Bienenstock, author of How to Smoke Pot (Properly): A Highbrow Guide to Getting High and co-creator of the Great Moments in Weed History podcast. “If something smells like mold, if something smells like rot, it really has to be avoided,” he advised me via video chat. “And of course, for people new to cannabis – or even not that new – it can be really difficult to have the confidence to make these kinds of distinctions, especially if you are unaware of the wide range of smells Cannabis. In my opinion, there is an important dividing line here [happens]: Is this a natural expression of the terpenes of the cannabis plant or is it a foreign element? “

The chemical compounds behind the stinking smell

Organic compounds like butyric acid can be pleasant when found in Parmesan cheese but repellent when smelled in vomit. It is possible that some crops that smell like feces simply have higher levels of flavoring, which most flowers only contain traces of.

One component is pungent, cheesy isovaleric acid, which smells like sweaty feet and occurs in varieties that smell of cheese. Other likely suspects are caprylic acid, which has a musty, rancid odor; sulphurous, garlic-like thiols; and the rotting, carbonaceous methyl mercaptans that cannabis shares with hops.

Since smelly weed isn’t very sought after, it is possible that these compounds could be produced if a grower encounters an especially funky phenotype. That’s what happens to “Cat Piss,” a term used to refer to several strains with completely different genetics; If a particular plant gives off a strong ammonia odor, it will be rewarded with the unflattering nickname.

When weed goes wrong

Unfortunately, unwanted flavors can also indicate that something has gone seriously sideways during the cultivation, curing, or storage of your cannabis. According to Home Grow Chicago, a Chicago-based home growing education company, “Weird smells are usually caused by improper drying, too fast or too little. The more likely culprit of the bad smell is over-fertilization with nitrogen. “

“When something doesn’t smell right,” says Beehive, “the nose is a very powerful tool, and it’s really designed to keep us from picking up things that make us sick. In general, when your nose is emitting those red flags, you want to listen. ”

Despite these warnings, he said, “I will not be the person who tells someone to throw away their weed. I don’t want to forget what it was like to have very limited choices on your weed. If this is your quarter of an ounce of weed to get through the next few weeks, be it financially or just access to cannabis, I know how hard a decision could be. “

Does your cannabis smell like feces due to a natural variation or was there a problem in the supply chain? It’s a nerve-wracking phone call to send back an expensive bottle of wine because you think it’s corked.

When you source cannabis from a highly skilled breeder you know, trust, and respect, encountering weed that smells like feces could be an interesting experience to broaden your horizons, just like Keith Beavers and his tastings, the unspoiled and compare corked wine. You may be able to spot similarities with other earthy varieties of flowers and enjoy the taste or effect.

If you can’t trace your purchases back to a reputable source, Triple D, let this smelly bag teach you a lesson. You should smell weed before buying it, not only to check its terpene profile or freshness, but also for early warning signs of powdery mildew, mold, or an improperly managed crop.

Find strains that smell like feces

If you’re curious about strains purposely bred to smell funky, you’re in luck. While Unicorn Poop carries the scent of citrus and diesel, Dog Shit is said to smell like its namesake. It might be named after an infamous Up in Smoke scene where Chong Cheech offers a weird oversized Maui Wowie joint with “some Labrador in it.”