How to talk to your parents about weed on vacation
Cannabis can be a controversial topic despite its legal status, and chances are it will be home for the vacation.
When it comes to cannabis and parents, things usually go one of two ways. Some parents want to blame weed for the world’s problems, others want to light a joint with you.
My own parents tend to go along with the former. As with most problems that arise in this world, we deeply agree. About politics, science, what to cook for Christmas dinner. However, cannabis is the only problem I couldn’t argue with them about.
They were raised by a generation that bought into the whole Reefer Madness scam, so I can’t blame them. But as I approach another home vacation, I wonder if there might be a way to break through their brick wall.
Ask permission before “having the conversation”
Lizzie Post, author of Higher Etiquette and great-great-granddaughter of renowned etiquette expert Emily Post, has some helpful advice for anyone in this situation.
“Ask for permission to have the conversation first, a tactic we often use in etiquette when talking about a sensitive subject,” she notes. “Get them to join the conversation so that you not only speak to someone, but hopefully also have the opportunity to speak to someone.”
The boomer generation grew up with decades of anti-cannabis propaganda. This prohibitive thinking does not go away overnight.
Post also points out the power of your tone and the benefit of stepping back before calming down and taking any defensive stance out of your voice.
“I try to hear the voice I’m looking for in my head before I speak – that may mean taking a minute to focus.” She suggests validating her perspective first and Acknowledge the concerns they have and then try to express your point of view on the matter.
“Some people are still closed, but some will try to have the conversation with you.”
Talking about cannabis will help normalize you
Another advocate, Chela Coenen, who runs the Cannabis Helps Dementia podcast, has firsthand experience of the challenges a parent faces when dealing with medicinal cannabis.
After years of testing various drugs, cannabis was the most effective treatment for her mother’s dementia diagnosis. Coenen noted that the best way to talk to your parents about the plant is to focus on its “non-intoxicating” benefits.
“Find a story of someone you can relate to who benefits from cannabis on the news or a study to talk about,” she said. “I also bring an effective topical ointment that I can offer for pain relief without getting anyone high.”
Post agrees, pointing out how important it is for them to see shining examples of cannabis users or patients who are successful and happy in life and at work.
“My parents saw cannabis in my life, but they didn’t see my work or my enthusiasm for friendships and socializing diminish. When drugs or other substances are viewed as bad, they often get the impression that they are having a negative impact on life, ”said Post.
Jessica Mac, a writer and marketer from Salt Spring Island, BC, knew her father smoked weed, but they never talked about it. As a teenager, she remembers the smell in the garage that made her realize her father was a smoker, but she never spoke to him about it.
It wasn’t until she started writing about cannabis as an adult that he slowly began to open up about his own use. Sometimes stimulating the conversation can be a powerful normalization tool.
“I went home one summer and he was growing cannabis in his garden and that opened the door because he saw that I knew what I was talking about. I bought him weed seeds for Christmas and now he’s coming to me for advice on this. “
Prohibition propaganda took its toll
The boomer generation grew up at a time when the use of cannabis was seen as a recreational activity and was banned.
While some boomers certainly helped de-stigmatize weed, many fell victim to the counterculture, something they didn’t necessarily identify with.
“You’ve been saying it’s no good for 60 years,” Post noted. “The people who brought it out in its prime were part of a counterculture movement that was deliberately trying to dress, look, and act differently.”
Post explains how hard it is to expect someone to change their mind right away. Especially after seeing only one representation of what a cannabis user looks like for decades. It takes time to understand the many facets of cannabis and its role in society.
And even after legalization, the fear of reefer madness still plays on repetition in their minds.
“The boomer generation grew up on decades and decades of anti-cannabis sentiment,” said Mac Leafly. “My father – even though he’s very into cannabis – is still scared of talking about it on the phone or even mentioning it in an email.”
“He still calls them his ‘tomato plants’. I asked him if I could give him a little pipe and he said ‘no, no, no’ because he was really scared of getting caught with utensils. I think a lot of boomers have all these problems with it. ”
Post’s final wisdom: acknowledge that cannabis is just a plant, not inherently bad or good. She explains that there are negative aspects that need to be acknowledged, especially since it is still illegal in most parts of the world.
“Human trafficking, crime and people who are injured by [prohibition] is a bad thing – legalization [can help] eliminate the bad things that result from it. We have legal guns, alcohol is legal, tobacco is legal, there are a lot of so-called ‘bad’ things out there that are perfectly legal. “
Legalization allows people to be fully educated about the risks and benefits of cannabis without relying on illegal sources.
“Getting people to really understand and see the bigger picture – the good, the bad, the ugly, the wonderful, the wonderful – all of that,” Post said.
And at the end of the day, that’s all you can really do.
Lisa Lagace
Lisa Lagace is a Toronto-based lifestyle, health and entertainment freelance writer. You can find her work on NPR, New York Post, Marie Claire, and more.
View article by Lisa Lagace
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